How to amend & rebuild trust with your bf after if you have lied?

Of coarse this should be no excuse but I seem to use it every time I lie to the man I love. I have been in 2 long term very hurtful relationships where I gave 100% honesty, trust, etc %26amp; I got the lying, cheating, %26amp; the hurt, %26amp; I basically lost trust in men. My current bf is one who is very inexpressive secretive %26amp; private when it comes to his stuff because it takes him time to trust and open up with someone but along with some of his actions I panic because I cant pinpoint his intentions so I occasionally lie %26amp; mastermind something I have learned from many to play games to see if I could see where his heart and mind is or get a clue whether to run or stay based on my analysis or uncoverings. So far it has done so much backfiring because at the end of the day I am not who I am or ashamed at what I got myself into %26amp; stuck because I am requesting what I am not giving. I want us to move forward %26amp; for us to trust each other but I know its hard because of the things I do because I don't fully trust him %26amp; it eventually leads to craziness, that ends up with me feeling us hurt %26amp; hopeless....Help!!!!How to amend %26amp; rebuild trust with your bf after if you have lied?
talk to him have open conversationHow to amend %26amp; rebuild trust with your bf after if you have lied?
oh boy, what a dilemma!! I should know this all too well as i too have done it. Just be upfront and straight with them. Remember tho, actions are louder than words. You have to prove it to the person that what you want from them is true and wont do it again. Once you lie and it comes back to you 10fold, its hard to work it out.
open conversation, communication
You are your own worst enemy. You mention he has a hard time opening up, I wouldn't open up to someone who is constantly playing games either!!



Your insecurities are not because of him, they are because of your past. He's not the one who needs to change, you are. You need to get to the root of your past and realize that you have a clean slate this time and a chance to trust again. Whether or not you take that chance is up to you.
you a girl?

trample him!! :))
start from scartch and try to bulild back up trust. =)
Well, trust is the building blocks to a good relationship.. You HAVE to the trust the other significant other because if not, there is really no point in going any further. I have been hurt, lied to, cheated on - all of that, but at the end of the day, I still have faith in my other and trust him. People might see that as wrong, but if you really care about each other, you will forgive them, not necessarily forget.

Tell your man to open up, because if your he type of girl that needs that type of attention, he should know.

If you really want this to work, you need to tell him everything on your mind even if you think it could back fire. If it does, it's not worth it.

Please talk to him, before it's too late!
In my experiences, once trust is truly lost, it never comes back. I've always felt that if you don't trust each other, there IS a reason... whether it's on the surface and easy to see, or something hidden that may NEVER be discovered. Chemistry plays so much into this... if you always feel uneasy about someone, and they aren't giving you what you need after a fair amount of time, then you just have to make a decision. Decide if you have the self-esteem and strength to let him/her go and move on... or if you want to be stuck in an unhappy situation waiting for someone better to come along. Your decisions in situations like this show your true character. Are you strong and deserve what you need in a relationship, or are you content to be unfulfilled and always wondering what could have been?
You shoudnt lie you just end up in a bigger lie. People get hurt if you lie and you should just tell your partner the truth they would respect you insted of getting hurt.
first off...STOP LYING....I am dating someone who is just the way you described your boyfreind, and believe me there are other ways of finding out how they feel without having to lie to them. If you really love him, then you wouldn't be lying to him. So now, if you've decided that do DO actually love him, start being extremely honest. stop trying to trick him into telling you how he feels, if he feels a certain way, he'll tell you eventually, just stop messing with his head, no one wants to play head games.
well you cant expect him to trust you when you dont fully trust him. i think this is a issue more in yourself than anything. the best thing to do is explain that to him. be 100 percent honest. its the only way to stop living a lie. being in a relationship where 2 people dont trust each other is a lie. this way by talking you can really see whats going on with him too. if he is not ready to really open up and trust you there nothing you . just speak from your heart and you have nothing to lose. i really hopes everything works out
you need to stop. take the first step toward being and honest, trustworthy, and trusting person. i know it is scary to put yourself out there. Right now though, you are being deceitful just to prove to yourself that he is what he says he is. You dont want to have to think of yourself that way. Get over it, this is a new relationship, not one of the old guys who hurt you. He deserves a clean slate.
Well first of all you both need to pray and ask god to remove the distrust from your heart. Then you both have to forgive each other and work on being honest and trusting each other. You have to let go of your past and move forward. The longer you both keep holding on to your past the longer your going to have problems. And you have to be more understanding. Everyone deserves thier own privacy. He needs his and you need yours. So stop getting so upset with him because of this. And remember this is going to take time so be patient.
Breaking ones trust is easy but building ones trust back up is the hardest part specially after a lie has been told, you don't know if you could ever trust that person again and it takes a lot of sweat and tears so to speak to get it back to good again if in fact you can rebuild that trust which takes a long time to do, but time and complete honesty over that time may help depends on the person.

Communication is the main key to a good relationship, you two need to talk to each other and file through your problems don't leave them unresolved. Talk about what makes you angry and what makes him angry, be honest and step up to the lies you told or admit to them and tell him you want to change you don't want your relationship based on lies. And tell him if he wants your relationship to work he will have to start opening up to you weather he likes it or not cause your relationship isn't going to get any better if he keeps it bottled up.

Just remember communication is key, you need to start talkin to each other or you will have nothing...and no more lies!