How did you get the strength to leave your emotionally abusive relationship?

I just want to say thanks to everyone in advance who is courageous enough to answer this question. I know from personal experience how hard it is to leave. I just need some strength and courage of my own I guess :)



We have been together for 5 years, and he is my second boyfriend. We started dating when he was 23 and I was 18, and we moved in together after 3 months of dating. Our relationship was strained with physical abuse in the beginning on both ends, but being so young, I guess it was a turn on to me??? I finally broke down and told him if he touched me again, I was done, and he hasn't since and that was 4 years ago. It just turned into emotional abuse I guess. I am not sure if this is even emotional abuse, or just the normal. It is just that when he gets mad at me, and not every time he gets mad only some times, he will call me names like bit*h or cun*, fat and ugly... It is not as bad now and he is actually trying to improve, but just 2 years ago we moved away from my home and whole family 10 hours away for his job promotion. A part of me wanted to not go, but then apart of me was happy to be with him. It seemed like almost immediately after I met him there, the ball was not in my court anymore, and the verbal stuff got kinda bad. I feel like I just lost a lot of respect for him. He would get angry because I didn't want him to do anal on me and say that our sex life sucked, so now subconsciously I just avoid sex with him... like my body just won't allow me to get into to it. He is very very very sweet at times, but then other times he is a jerk. Like he will just come out and ask me for a ********, or describe sex in a crude way, like, ';I just wanna pound your ......'; And that sickens me, and I view it as disrespectful. I don't want sex with him and we rarely have it, and I know he gets frustrated, but he shows it and says nasty things to me. I have tried to explain to him why I can't get excited and he has said sorry but he still wants the sex. I feel like even though he is trying to get better I don't want to try anymore... and sometimes I do feel like I want to try. I am going away in January to be back with my family so that I can go to school, and he is not really happy about it but he is going with it. Sometimes when he is nice I doubt myself and feel guilty for wanting to leave him, but when he is mean there is no doubt in my mind... I am so confused and scared



By the way, we are not marriedHow did you get the strength to leave your emotionally abusive relationship?
Leave him and try to get a perspective on things. What he is doing to you is emotional abuse and it will only make you feel like you deserve what he is doing. This is not love it is a classic example of an abusive relationship. You deserve better way better. No one deserves to be treated this way. Talk to someone about your relationship like a trusted family member they can help you understand what he is doing to you. Good luck and i wish you every happiness.How did you get the strength to leave your emotionally abusive relationship?
maybe the best thing you can do is leave and it will show him that he does not control your movements

my bf hit me and even though it hurt me so badly i couldnt leave because when he was nice he was my whole world. but in the end i left . he chased me and he changed he has never hurt me since ..





either way i hope all ends well