A little more detail?

thank you all for the advice on my first question.but let me give you a little more detail.We met in 01 cause i was in a dead end relationship(sorta like now) and she was in a abusive relationship...made to be a servant and raped ...We hooked up and basically told him and her to go fuqq themselves.She had a son who was 6 at the time and has let it be know verbally that he wish I would die so that he could have his family back...Fast forward to 03 and she thought I was cheating on her just because she didnt like the fact I had female friends(mind you we worked the same job ,same hours and all that ) but it turned out she was the one in the wrong cause she sent pics of herself to a guy on the internet(naked) and at first denied it till I showed her and she just broke down and said I wasnt there for her(wtf ever that means)...we did the trial seperation and reconciled ..But now it is a problem for her to cook a hot meal for our kids before 9pm or if she does laundry she ends up having to wash the clothes again cause they have sat in the washer(ya know and get that mildew ,sour smell to them)so in order for my household to have clean clothes I do the laundry every sunday..all day ..Her oldest son washes dishes that have been in the sink all week ..My 7 and 5 year old help out by ';cleaning'; the bathroom..I have to ask her to help out with our house and it is like pulling teeth.Like yesterday i was folding the laundry and she came in from work and was like can you move this stuff so I can sit down and I was like it is your stuff she was like well put it in the room(HER STUFF BUT SHE WANTS ME TOO PUT IN THE ROOM)I just walked away....my brother came over so she decides to go into our bedroom close the door and watch food network(as always) I thought that was rude and called her out on it she said she didnt even realize he was there..Then at 7 I was fixing the kids dinner and get them in the tub and she was like I was gonna cook and I was like when and she was like well you got it back to food network...I asked her what is up and she said and I quote...HERE WE GO AGAIN GUESS YOU WANT SUM OR SHOULD I JUST GET ON MY KNEES....Long story short I slept on the couch.I feel like this marriage is going down the drain and i cant stop it.I did the go out once a week thing...didnt work...try to get her into some kinda counseling but she feels that is putting our business in the streets...my question is how big a part is sex and communication to a relationship and how can I convey this to her?A little more detail?
Going to counseling is not putting your business on the streets. She probably knows she is wrong here and doesn't want to hear it. You have some major problems brewing, and better get some help ASAP. Sleeping on the couch is not a good thing at all, and it sounds like she has major problems with sex in general from her first marriage. I couldn't imagine living with someone who wasn't willing to work with me. I really hope you can get this worked out.A little more detail?
Get out of it and take the kids with you. She sounds lazy.